Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Just Be

This post was inspired by Raising Cubby: A Father and Son’s Adventures with Asperger’s, Trains, Tractors, and High Explosives by John Elder Robison. Parenting is a challenging job, but what challenges does a parent with Asperger's face? Join From Left to Write on March 12 as we discuss Raising Cubby. As a member, I received a copy of the book for review purposes.  
 If anyone knows who the lovely photographer Tara Whitney is...or stalks follows her instagrams as much as I do...you may know her philosophy is "Just Be".  I may have dismissed that idea off in the past as a kind of hippie, laid back concept...but after mulling over what to write about after reading this book, I realized how profound that concept of "Just Be" is!

The author had many decisions to make in raising his son-as we all do-but coupled with his son's issues, (as well as his own) he seemed to have decisions coming every which way.  A few years ago, I stumbled onto the "mommy blogs".  You know, those pretty blogs with gorgeous pictues of children and neat as a pin darling homes and special traditions and celebrations almost every day.  I admit, I fell for them, hook, line, and sinker.  I scoured them for ideas, tried to keep up, and felt dismayed when I looked at my messy home with the never ending tornado of legos and socks and sneakers (and no granite countertops-eek!).  I admit, I may have tried to even copy that here on my blog at one point or another.  But the truth is-that's not me.  And honestly, that's not anyone!  I've met many moms, been in MOPS groups, work with families everyday, and there is no family that compares to the blogs.  I deleted those glossy blog from my feeds, but every once in while, I do check one or two.  It seems like they have moved away from trying to showcase the perfect lives (that they don't really have), and they are starting to show the cracks and the not-so-perfect behind the scenes.  That's healthy-that's realistic-that can make their blog readers sigh with relief.

So this is where the philopophy "Just Be" comes in...just be...the best you can be.  The best mom you can be, the best you can be...I may not win any parenting awards, but I know I am a good mom.  I still struggle with how to assign chores (I've pinned about a million ideas) and wonder how to handle this whole computer/ipod/video games/tv debate...trying to implement a "Screen Free Sunday"...trying being the key word...mama needs a little screen time, too!  But I know every day is a new start and I can try again to be the best me I can.  We mamas need to support each other, share our feelings, share both our triumphs and our failures, and start again.  And since this book was written by a dad, who I think did his best, let's include the dads...just be the best parent.  Just Be.


janaki said...

What a wonderful message - definitely, Just Be! And it's all good, even when the cracks are showing (or maybe especially). I think one of my jobs as the mommy is to show that I'm not perfect, so that my kids know that being perfect isn't the goal. It's about being honest and genuine.

Thien-Kim aka Kim said...

I love this! I used to get sucked into those craft blogs with gorgeous photos, tutorials weekly. Then I realized that I enjoy creating for myself, not for a deadline! Thanks for the reminder.

Socamom.com said...

There are so many days that I have to decide to "just be" - and let the kids do that too. I think it keeps us all sane.